Page 3  "Like A Second Mother"

Later on, I did the same thing with Eric, my grandson. My oldest daughter was in the army in Texas when he was born, and she didn't know what to do about child care. She didn't want to leave him with a caretaker when he was so young. So I said to her, "Bring the baby to me. I will take care of him for the first year. And after that, you can take him back." I think he was two weeks old when he came to me. I would bring him to work with me every day, and he played with Christopher and Monica, who is two years younger than Christopher. And they were just like brothers and sisters playing together. He really looked forward to going to work with me. 

When the children were young, we enjoyed cuddling. We called it "snuggling." We'd make a little nest with a quilt in a corner, and then we'd read. I would rock them in my arms, and I sang to them all the time. I sang them to sleep. I sang gospel and old spiritual songs that my grandmother and my mother used to sing to me and my sisters, and they really enjoyed that. I'd get down on the floor with them, and we'd play with blocks. I have no problem with getting down on the floor and playing with children. The children and I just had a grand time together. We would climb on the jungle gym, I would pull them in the wagon up and down the driveway, we would go on nature hunts, we'd have little picnics in the yard-just anything that kept them happy and entertained. When they were a little older, I took them to school and picked them up.
And when they had ice skating or karate or gymnastics or doctors' appointments, I did those things too. And sometimes Susannah would come over to my house with friends of hers, and we'd just have a ball. I always had a yard full of children. We'd bake cookies and make lemonade, and we had such a good time. I love being with children.

DIANA: Di is able to relate to children in a way that's absolutely magical. She connects with Susannah at her age level in a way that is truly a gift. They used to play "Sister" for hours. And she would never turn the television on-never! I thought that was just incredible, because even I would turn on the television. I would say, "It's perfectly OK, Di. You've been with Susannah for eight hours. Just let her watch Sesame Street. But she would say, "I prefer not to, if that's all right with you." And every day, when I came home, they would be sitting at the kitchen table, very gently reading a book together or playing with Play-Doh. I couldn't do that; I'm no good at it. I can take Susannah to museums, I help her with her homework, I teach her how to use the computer. So I can do all the intellectual things comfortably, and the emotional connections are really important to me too. We talk about the problems of being twelve-making friends and that kind of stuff. But I was never good at sitting on the floor playing fantasy games. It would drive me nuts. Di can do it for hours! It's amazing, and I'm very appreciative of that. So Susannah got a different kind of parenting for a few hours a day-a less analytical, less intellectual and maybe a more basic kind of parenting. 

Di is a very different kind of person than I am. She's much slower paced, less frenetic. Di is one of the few people I've ever met who really can do it all. She doesn't move fast, but she gets everything done. And she never raised her voice at the children, which is amazing. She never got exasperated; she was always even-tempered. And if anything went wrong, she could cope with it. I remember when Chris was in nursery school, she called me at the office one day and said, in a friendly, relaxed way, "Hi, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I just wanted you to know that the school called, and Christopher has a bit of a flu. So I picked him up and took him to the doctor, and Dr. Ross said to keep him home for a few days. And I started him on Tylenol, and his fever is down, and he's feeling fine now. But I just thought you might want to know." And I thought, "Whoah! You don't get this very often!"

DI: I know that I can sit down with Diana and talk about any problems I might have. And she sits down and shares with me any problems that she might have. This really is the way it is! People don't believe me, but that's the type of relationship we have. I'm not exaggerating.

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