Nanny Net News December 2003
=====================================
In This Issue:
- A Note from the Editor
- Holiday Gift Ideas for Nanny
- Our Featured Nanny of the Month - Glenda Propst
- 2003 - 2004 Nanny Salary and Benefit Survey
- Ask the Experts Q & A
- Please Support our Sponsors
A Note from the Editor
Hello Everyone,
Well, we have a great newsletter for you this month. INA has helped
substantially with the content as you will see. We have the results
of the recent salary survey conducted by INA as well as the results
to their question about "gifts for nannies." This I think you will
find very interesting.
Our Nanny of the Month is Glenda Propst. Many of you may already
know Glenda as she is quite the active nanny. I met Glenda online
back in 1998 when I was just starting the Parents With Nannies
discussion list. She was one of my first members and has since
taken over the job as co-moderator. If it weren't for Glenda I
probably would never have ventured very far into the nanny industry.
She has been such an incredible help to me and has shown such
support and respect for my work over the years that I really can't
begin to tell you what an affect she has had on what I do. And,
consequently, she's become a close friend. We don't get to chat
online as much as we used to, but we do keep in touch and rely on
eachother for advice and mutual cheerleading sessions from time to
time.
Glenda truly is an inspiring nanny and a force to be reckoned with
in the industry. I hope you enjoy our interview with Glenda and
want to remind you to please send in your nominations for future
Nannies of the Month. There is a link below Glenda's article to the
form.
Ok, that's it from me for this month. Have a wonderful Holiday.
Stay safe, don't eat too much and most of all enjoy those little
ones. God Bless..
Deborah Smith
Editor
Nanny Net News
PS: Many of you may be getting this newsletter in text format and
not realize that we have a brand new HTML format that is much more
attractive and includes images such as a picture of our Nanny of the
Month.
If you would like to switch your subscription format to HTML, please
send me an email and I will be happy to make that change.
Holiday Gift Ideas for Nanny
Over 600 nannies responded to INA's salary and benefits survey.
Some of there responses to the question "What gifts or rewards have
you received from employers that you especially appreciated?" are
listed below.
In case you don't have a private jet to lend or a vacation home in
the Swiss Alps, there are other options here you might find useful.
TIVO, DVD Player, VCR. Camera, Cell Phone, TV, Perfume,
Tiffany Jewelry
Gift Certificates for: travel, spa, restaurants
Thank you cards/flowers/candy
Other more interesting ideas:
Hosted engagement party, Stock certificates & RA, Antiques and
collectibles, Scrap booking supplies, Brand new car, all expense
paid trips, College tuition/pay for classes, Pajama and robe set,
Plane tickets home to see family, Designer handbags, use of private
jet
Health Club membership/Personal Trainer, use of family's vacation
homes, Computer, Gift Certificates for clothes, Books and DVD's Beauty
treatment gift basket, Pay for conference expenses, Keepsakes from
the children, Many gifts included the nanny’s spouse or child, such
as travel, sporting events, theater or restaurants.
Cash gifts ranged from one week or two weeks salary up to $1,800 for
occasions such as: Christmas, birthday, Mother's Day, Valentines
Day, anniversary of hire date or simply to say thank you.
The most frequently mentioned things were cards and notes from the
parents saying how happy they are that she/he is taking such good
care of their children. Gifts related to the children such as,
framed photos, charms, artwork and cards done by the children were
also greatly appreciated.
I'm going to finish out this article with my own shameless
advertising "Our Nanny T-Shirts and Sweatshirts make wonderful gifts
for Nanny!" Hint, Hint. You can order online through our gift shop
using the link below.
The Nanny Gift Shop
Our Featured Nanny of the Month - Glenda Propst
Glenda has been a Professional Nanny for the past 19 years, working
with her first employer for 8 years and her current for almost 11.
She is the Co-Founder and Co-President of the National Association
of Nannies, a national, education focused support organization run
by nannies for nannies. She was a founding member of the
International Nanny Association and a recipient of INA's "Nanny of
the Year" Award in 1991.
Q: How long have you been a nanny and what made you decide to become
a nanny?
A: I have been a nanny for 19 years. I was a Child Care Center
Director for 9 years. When I turned 30, I decided I wanted to change
careers but still work with children. Ironically, it was about the
same time that I discovered that the St. Louis Child Day Care
Association was starting a nanny training program.
This is when I chose to become a professional nanny.
Q: What do you think is the most important thing to remember when
caring for children?
A: I think it is very important to remember that we need to listen
to them and try to see the world through their eyes. Sometimes
children can be wiser than adults if we just stop to listen to what
they are saying to us.
Even an infant can communicate with you if you take the time to tune
into them.
Q: What steps have you taken to be the best nanny you can be?
A: What they don’t teach you in nanny school is how to cope with the
frustration, the loneliness and the lack of understanding that comes
with the territory of being a nanny. I tried to improve the nanny
profession on an international and national level, first as a
founding member and board member of INA (The International Nanny
Association) and in 1992 by Co Founding the National Association of
Nannies with Dr. Eva Harkness Ph.d and the late Harriette Grant.In
these organizations the goal was to help nannies connect. Through
those connections they were better able to network with each other
and offer each other support, experience, friendship and ultimately
to view themselves as professionals.
Q: What is your fondest memory in your nanny career?
A: I have so many fond memories that is hard to narrow it down to
just one. The first one that comes to mind is when I was the INA
Nanny of the year. My employer and my 6 year old charge flew to
Dallas to surprise me at the conference where I was to receive the
award. My sister and my niece were already there and that was the
most incredible day of my life, until 1996 when I married my
incredible husband, and both of my former charges and my current
charge who was 2 ½ at the time, were a part of my wedding.
Q: What advice would you give a new nanny just starting out?
A: You need to research this profession and make sure you understand
its unique challenges and how hard it can be. Even on your best
days, it is hard work. You also need to realize that when you commit
to a family to care for their children, you need to be sure about
that commitment. Sometimes you get into a bad situation no matter
how careful you are, and you should never stay in a situation where
you feel abused or unsafe but, this is not the kind of job where you
work a few days and then if you decide you don’t like it just quit.
We matter to the children we care for and constantly having to
change nannies is emotional for a child. Be sure to ask all the
right questions in the interview so that you don’t encounter
“surprises” once you start working.
The other thing I would say is that you have to remember, these are
not your children. You should never allow or encourage them to call
you mommy, and you should remember that there is a fine line between
doing your job as a nanny and stepping over the line into a parents
shoes and onto a parents toes. The parents have the final say and
you should respect them.
Q: What has being a nanny taught you?
A: Being a nanny has taught me so much beyond just the realm of
childcare. It has taught me how to communicate and how to stand up
for myself and my needs. It has given me a bird’s eye view of
marriage and the importance of communication in all relationships
and I believe that I am a better wife because of that. It has
taught me so much about loving and caring for someone else’s
children and what an impact I have in that relationship. It has
also taught me that childhood spins by in the blink of an eye and
everyday is one day in the life of child that you can’t get back so
you have to make it count.
Q: What is the most challenging thing about being a nanny?
A: Leaving the children you have loved and nurtured from infancy. I
was with my first family for 8 years. My former charges are now 16
and 19 and I still miss them terribly. I see them a few times a year
and we chat online. My 19 year old is now away at college and we
can chat everyday, but for the last 10 years there has been this
void in my heart. My current charges are 10 and almost 5. It is very
hard for me to make it through more than 3 or 4 days without at
least saying Hi to them. They are such a huge part of my life.
I have cared for 4 great kids in the last 19 years. They are all
sweet and sensitive and caring. I am so proud of each of them and
it's hard to zero in on one short story, but my current charges say
such sweet things to me.
Each day before I leave, they thank me for taking care of them,
something their parents truly instilled in them and something the
parents do too. Being appreciated is so important.
One day last year, my 10 year old said " Are you going to pick me up
after school today? and I said "Yes!" and he said " Oh good! and
then he said " I really like it when you pick me up" I said "Why?
and he said "Well because if I have a bad day you always comfort me
and I really like that"
You can't put a price tag on those kind of moments and they
definitely reassure me that I made the right choice in my career.
Click here to nominate a "Nanny of the Month."
http://nannynews.c.tep1.com/maabIPeaa2DB7aaaaaab/
2003 - 2004 Nanny Salary and Benefit Survey
Agencies Report on Salaries
INA asked several agencies in various locations of the United States
what they found to be the average salary that their clients were
offering and what the average educational level was of nannies that
they placed.
If you are getting this newsletter in text form and cannot see the
table to your right, click on the link below to view the results of
INA's Salary Survey.
Click here for more on Nanny Salaries
Nanny Salaries
Ask the Experts Q & A
Q: For how long can I have a nanny on trial period before making a
contract?
A: There is no hard and fast rule about this. If you work with an
agency, usually they have a policy that you must follow. If you
have hired a nanny on your own it comes down to what each of you are
comfortable with. Here's
what to watch out for: If a trial is YOUR idea, the nanny may feel
that you are ambivalent about her and she will likely continue to
interview (there's always a better job out there) and by the time,
or perhaps before you tell
her you're ready to make a commitment, she may tell you she's found
another job. If the trial is HER idea, you need to think about what
it is that you are hesitant about & if you want to put your children
through one trial period after another.
What I feel works is to have a long second interview, perhaps a full
day. Talk with every single reference - even if the agency did the
references, you will have different questions and it will give you a
chance to get to know her better. If you have a gut feeling that
it's not the right person for you - you're probably right so why do
a trial at all? I would say that if you do a trial, regardless of
who's idea it was, make it short and productive. If you have
questions about how she'll care for your infant, use the trial to
have her do just that.
Q: Hi I need some advice... I've been a nanny for about 6 months
now. I moved out of state to nanny for 2 middle age boys. The boys
are great, we get along wonderful, which is the root of the problem.
This morning the littlest one was pulling the ribbon in my hair, I told
him to quit, he kept doing it, however, we were completely joking
around. His mother overheard and came storming back in and told him
he wanted to speak to him privately. I overheard though, she told
him that if I didn't punish him, she would. Then I just got a call
from her. She said that she was disturbed by what happened and that
I need to set boundaries and limitations with him so he knows who is in charge.
We have that, when I tell him to stop or to go do something and seriously mean it,
he does it.
I tried to tell her that, but she wouldn't believe it because she
"has witnessed it before". It's like she has to be right, even
though she has no clue what is going on. I'm not sure how to handle
this one.
A: I can see your point, but I can also see mom's point. You are
just playing and you are not intentionally teaching him how to be
obnoxious. Yet depending on how old the youngest is, it could be
hard for him to make the distinction between you and his female
cousin, or classmate, for instance - who may not appreciate him
pulling on her hair ribbon.
Think of it this way; my kids have never been allowed to rough house
with each other - and they are boys. It is NOT ok (in my humble
opinion, or in our house:-) for kids to "play fight" (re: push,
punch, pull hair, shove,
"accidentally" bump into them as they are walking by, etc.) - even
if it's just in fun. Why? Here's why; kids cannot always make the
proper distinctions and sometimes do not know where to draw the
line. A little bit
of rough-housing, kidding-around, whatever you want to call it, can
quickly become nasty when someone isn't in the mood, or if one
hurts the other unintentionally. As important, many parents feel
that kids should
understand - that it's just not ok to be physically assertive - note
that I say assertive, not aggressive. And that's the "line" I am
talking about.
Respecting the other person's physical space may be important for
your employer, but she is apparently not communicating this in an
effective way to you. You may want to ask your employer about the
instances she has "wittnessed" and see if the theme is the same.
Ask her directly if the real issue is that she doesn't want the kids
to be physical with each other or, you - even
just in fun. Hopefully this situation will create more understanding
between the two of you.
Good luck
Anne Merchant
Director of the Professional Nanny Online College & Training Program
offering free tuition and college credits for nannies worldwide
www.professionalnanny.com
Please Support our Sponsors
NANNYPAY HOME PAYROLL SOFTWARE
Use NannyPay to calculate all federal
and state withholding taxes for your nanny and other
domestic employees. Print paystubs, W2's and liability reports right
from home.
Download a FREE 30 Day Demo, NOW!
http://www.NannyPay.com
Please feel free to pass this e-zine along to your friends.
However, we ask that you keep it intact and forward it in its
entirety.
Copyright - 1999-2003 Parents With Nannies, Inc.
